It happens at least once a week. I’ll be sitting in my office chair, answering emails and absentmindedly tapping my foot, and Graham will speak a Big Idea. Out into the air. Just like its nothing. Just like “Hey, what if….” And my mind rebels against what it’s just heard. Doubt takes control of all of my senses and it’s all I can do not to spin my chair around with the speed of a rocket launch and say horrible things to him from that place in my heart where Fear lives. Because how dare he make it look so easy to dream big. Because what if we do. And what if we fail. How would we recover from that kind of heartache and disappointment. Isn’t it just safer to stay inside the house with the blinds closed and the covers drawn over our heads. And, even though I know it isn’t the right answer, I usually just mumble a noncommittal “Ohhhh. I don’t know.” And go back to the foot tapping. Feeling internally like I’ve just run an emotional iron man.
Because I know that poking holes in something never built anything. I know that acting on fear isn’t the stuff that dreams are made of. But still I doubt. Still I shudder at the idea of taking leaps. Because what if I find out that I just don’t quite have what it takes. And worse, what if Graham does. And I just can’t keep up.
So, for the first time in our businesses history, we are setting time aside to nourish the Dreamer inside each of us. We are attending the What If Conference for Creative Entrepreneurs in February. And of course I am terrified. And Doubt will probably try to convince me to spend the whole trip inside of our hotel room, ordering room service and instructing Graham to take good notes for me. But I simply won’t let it. Because around here? Well, we are just about done with this whole keep-our-feet-on-the-ground thing.